The problem with Arnost wearing this type of top is that he is extremely fuckable. He is exactly the kind of guy I want to see naked, oiled up and ready for a good boning. But that top is going to cause problems. Not, you understand, if I got to go to bed with him because shirts come off. It's my worry that I am now going to associate that shirt with a extremely gorgeous polar bear. I am going to get turned on the minute I see that shirt. The next time I am in a bookstore buying children's book for family or the kids of friends, I'll get a very powerful and obvious erection (possible with pre-cum seepage) the moment I see a 'Where's Wally?' book. Then everyone in the store will think I'm some kind of pervert who gets off hanging around the children's area of a book store. I'll end up on the sex-offender register all because of Mr Goldflam and it won't be because I broke into his house and climbed into bed with him. Although, that could potentially happen too.
There's Wally!! Fuck you - I'm not going to be the only one!
If he is standing in front of a portrait of himself, he should beat the artist to death with their easel
"Hmmmm - a few more of these and I'll be anybody's"
Although he writes children's books, Arnost Goldflam does not feels safe reading to children without some protection. You've seen the kids in 'Hostel' right?