Monday, 15 February 2010

A Yesteryear politician to behold

With a few exceptions, in general, politicians these days tend to be rather bland looking.  Certainly, to get to the top of the tree, you seem to have look like you were designed by a PR company (Tony Blair, Barack Obama, David Cameron - I don't count Gordon Brown since he wasn't actually voted in).  But long ago, you stood a better chance if you looked learned and wise.  Most importantly, bell-end explodingly hot!  America, for some reason, has had quite a few shagable presidents in the past.  Others will follow, but the biggest of big bear daddies for me was William Howard Taft.  Jesus - look at the moustache.  Look at the lovely body.  Look at the crotch and ass!!!  I'd vote for him (if I was American) purely on looks.  Honestly, his policies could involve sticking babies on spikes, I'd still be out campaigning for him.  A sheer waste as a straight man.  You know the sex he got would never have been that good.  Man, I would do things to him that would make his head cave in.  That sounded better in my head.  I do think a rule should be introduced into US politics that anyone occupying the Oval Office should have to adopt a Taft moustache and frame.  Then people would be interested in politics.  I'll get to Grover Cleveland and Chester J Arthur in time.  For just now I can fantasize about Taft and how good his balls would have smelled.


  1. i couldn't agree more !! you're reading my mind man

  2. Same here. I love Taft and I bet those balls smelled like leather and pure sex.

  3. It just occurred to me that the older, chubbier Al Gore looks a lot like Taft - in a good way. Big Al, like Taft, needs to be "seated" to be fully appreciated. As a younger man he wasn't particularly attractive to me; he was too stiff and male model-ish. Now, with age and chub, that innate stiffness has been obscured to a large degree and his daddy-like charms have risen to the top. I'd do him in a second - and I'll be that he'd like it.

  4. Taft’s policies were basically, “whatever Teddy was unable to enact during his terms that’s not so unpopular it will make people dislike me.” Taft got kind of a reputation as a “do-nothing” president, which is why Wilson steamrolled over him in 1912. He was also not terribly happy with his role as US President, his later career as Chief Justice was more to his liking.

    Taft was also obviously very straight, with three children and an always-smiling wife Helen. Clearly, he was keeping her happy in more ways than one (she was probably a bit of a chubby-chaser too, which helped).

    Suggestion for a future edition, William Shafter, major-general and breakout star of the Spanish-American War. Not only was he enormous and cuddly, he had one of the most incredible moustaches of the 19th Century, the sort that has one asking, “is there even a mouth behind there?”